This Week's Thoughts...9

• Taking a day off is so nice, and something people should do more of.  It definitely helps a work/life balance and puts other things in perspective.   
• Which is key, as in: perspective.
• Violence among youth is a tragedy.  I have known or been around two or three students that have been murdered as a direct result of gang violence, and it is such a tragedy.  So useless.  So sad.  
• Finding one's groove is a harder than it initially seems.  It seems like it should be like: this is who I am!  Here's what I do!!! But that isn't really how things work.  It's more like a door opens and you step through it, and then past that door is another door, so you go through that one too.  And then these series of doors open and the choice comes before you to either enter or flee.  
• Marriage is a good thing.  
• Golf is an odd fascination, and perhaps the American male way of showing just how average we truly are.  If you hit the target goal - par - all you've done is exactly what you were supposed to do.  Like if the par is 4, you're supposed to hit a golf ball four times to get it in the hole.  But people celebrate achieving a feat that is simply what should have happened anyway. 
• I am great at thinking about what should be done, and terrible at doing it; or maybe not terrible, but much slower.  I can make a plan in a second, but it might take a decade to act it out.
• They say that if you were to get sucked in a black hole, the gravity would be so great and of different strengths that your feet would be pulled down to infinity before your head ever even had a chance to realize anything was up.  
• That's close to a pun but not.
• I will floss if I put a thing of floss on the coffee table by our tv.  If it's there, I'll floss; if it isn't, I won't.  
• So, lately, I've been making sure to have a thing of floss by the tv.  

This Week's Thoughts...3

• How are so many people so douchey?  I don't get this.  Almost everyone I've ever met likes it best when people get along and are kind and civil, yet when it comes to putting this into practice, few seem able to execute.
• This is especially true when it comes to money.  There are a lot of times when I wish money didn't exist.  For this paper, gold, or gold backing, people go to great lengths to screw one another.  We compare ourselves, not via what we can do, not through our general happiness or good graces, but by the bigger number in our accounts or possession.  
• Last Week Tonight is a great show.
• I'm extremely proud of my wife, Jessica, and the award she won.  I've been with her for a while, and have see the dedication, talent, and positive attitude she takes to her career every day, and to see her being noticed for this is great.  She won a major award this past week, called the Mover & Shaker award, given out by the Library Journal, which is a major deal, a real honor; she doesn't brag a lot, and would say something like 'it's cool', but not emphasize just how big of an honor it is, so I'm very proud for her.
• That's, probably, what a husband should do/be.
• Spending time doing things you like doing is a lot better than doing things you don't like to do.
• Non-alcoholic beer is not very good.  I tried some of it this week, and it leaves a lot to be desired.
• Which I shouldn't have been very surprised by in the first place.
• After Michigan State's loss to Middle Tennessee last week, I mostly blamed Tom Izzo; namely because he sat Deyonta Davis - a future NBA player on the bench instead of playing him in the second half.  I even posted my blame of Izzo of Facebook; I feel slightly guilty for that post.
• I'm much more of a sucker for cheesy slogans than I'd care to admit.  Like, I read this poster that said something about dreams are actions that haven't been taken or something like that, and as bad as I want to poke fault at that thing, it's pretty true.  I even felt inspired enough to do some things after that slogan; but man would I feel like a doof if I put that thing in my office.
• Podcasts are great.  
• As is exercise.  

This Week's Thoughts...1

• The first thought of the week was that it would be interesting to weave a weekly thought-narrative into The Real Tom Bratt Blog.  The course of a week can take a person a lot of different directions.  Since I've been keeping track, I've noticed how far ranging my different thoughts are - politics, social norms, baby talk, dick jokes, vegan tacos, etc. - yet, somehow, they weave a cohesively whole person, with a very human inner dialogue.
• Like, why do people call it fake if a person acts one way in one setting, but slightly different in another.  Rather than 'fake' Isn't this more akin to adaptability, which is a good thing?  And, of course people are going to act a bit different in places they like and feel comfortable.
• Romain lettuce is terrible in smoothies.
• Which is a bit odd because it tastes so good in salads with the same ingredients.
• Racism is extremely dumb.  Especially coming from people and groups that have no knowledge or access to people of the same group their 'racing' or discriminating against.  I think you shouldn't be able to comment on any group or custom unless you have knowledge of at least one person of that particular group or custom.
• It is way easier to keep weight off when you're older.
• Our country has been at war for way, way too long.
• I'm scared of how much people are carrying guns around, and think they're the opposite of understanding.  I'm speaking mostly of handguns and automatic weapons.  I'm against anything you can shoot without pulling the specific trigger and reloading.  Like, if it shoots several times in a row with the shooter having to do nothing, that is scary.
• The U.S. Postal System is pretty amazing.  You can get something across the country with a few strokes of a pen and a stamp.
• Tom Izzo halftime speeches are the best. 
• Happiness, true, inner happiness is possible, and the eternal possible to tap into.
• It's really sad when kids lie: especially when they get away with it.  
• House of Cards season 4 was fun to watch.
• Working with your hands, which I'm about to do, is rewarding.  

Donald Trump and Dick Size

A really great question to ask is: Is Donald Trump really just America's way of saying 'Fuck You' to politics as we know them?

I haven't come across a single person that looks at Donald Trump and says: yes.  This is exactly the man I want running this country.  

I haven't heard a single person list him as a potential candidate.  No one - not real news stations, not satirical new stations, not people in the street, or politicians - have taken, until extremely recently, Trump as a legitimate candidate; yet he's winning state after state.  News articles write things along the lines of: start taking Trump seriously, but a quick Google search shows he's over 25% of the way to nomination, having (close to) the equivalent of all the other candidates combined.  To describe him, people use words like insulting or bully.  He gets almost no positive press, yet he's dominating the polls.  The more ludicrous his comments, the more he gains ground, the further ahead he goes.  When Trump changes his position, we don't consider him lying.  When he says something vulgar, we don't think it profane.  He somehow gets a pass (almost, tackily: Trump Card).  It's as if the further he goes, the more we collectively like it.  

George W. Bush aroused anger.  Hilary Clinton extracts hate.  But Donald Trump, in addition to those things: humor.  

It's my opinion that Barack Obama was able to tap into the piece of all of us that wants a better future.  He symbolized, in us, something lost that can be found.  When the famous painting of him that read "Hope" circulated, we all thought: yes!  He does.  

Obama was able to invoke that feeling.  He's been able to articulate the most clearly, for my money, the way to a political Kingdom of Heaven.

Trump has basically the opposite effect.  He's able to tap into the worst of ourselves.  As comedian, and host of Last Week Tonight, John Oliver said (or at least something like this), "there's a part of me that is amused by this - it's a part of me that I hate, but it's there". 

This is true.  I feel this too.  

Trump is throwing the system on its proverbial face.  At some level, we all know that politics (and the political game) is bullshit that comes with a price tag, but Trump is showing that you can literally buy an election.  

Politics, and society in general, have been so passive (and consequently: passive aggressive) that we hold our tongues, run the other way to avoid offending, apologize when someone else mishears us, that we live scared.  

But Trump don't give a fuck.  

And we like this.  We want this.  

What every person that gives his name a vote is doing is saying that we're fed up with the machine.  They're (We're?) not actually voting for Trump, they're/we're voting against the system.  (And is there, or has there been, a candidate more representative of The System than Hilary Clinton?)  

If we take the candidates and give them a quick description, here's what we got:

Bernie Sanders - retro being again cool.

Ben Carson - that guy you really root for, but can't actually have on your team.

Hilary Clinton - the unfortunate offspring of everyone that's every lied to you, and corporate red tape

Ted Cruz - everything that's wrong with America - past, present, and future

Marco Rubio - the person you broke up with just before you met Mr. Right

And then there's Donald Trump.  He should be worse than everyone above him.  Almost every American dislikes something he's done or stands for.  He abuses power, is rude to minorities, crass to women, uses money as a bandaid, and the justice system as a threat.  

But, he's different.  He reminds me of Mr. Burns, having all illness simultaneously, yet somehow they balance one another out, keeping him in perfect health.

Maybe what we're seeing is Reality Television run for president.  And we're curious about what is happening.  Especially compared to the scripted story we've seen so many times.

It's interesting, because you can't really say you support Trump.  (Unless you're Chris Christie, and then we saw what happened, the memes are hilarious).  

To date, I've seen only one bumper sticker, and I laughed out loud when I saw it.  

This is the guy that's famous for saying, "You're fired".  He's basically insulted every type of person that exists.    

But at the same time, we also see his name on buildings in cities that look cool.  His building changed the Chicago skyline.  

He's in a unique position where we've seen him both on reality television and in cities do things.  So maybe that's why his words don't matter as much.  So then when he makes jokes about the size of his penis, we laugh.  

We can laugh.  

He gets away with it because we don't actually hold reality television to reality.  So his joke is funny, and It touches on a very male sense of humor.  

This is the appeal of The Donald.  He's saying fuck you to the system, while simultaneously confronting every American and the American system in general.  He's begging better people to get into politics, or else we're stuck with him.  He's forcing people to deal with the internal conflict in those of us that don't want to vote for Trump, but can't vote for Clinton.  

I'm very tempted to end this thing by saying I don't endorse Trump, or am appalled at what he says or how he treats people, but that would be to simply do what most of the country is doing.  And then, after I said that, I'd open an internet browser and there he'd be.   This is the reality.  

More than anything else, he's pointing that we need a change in options, a change in how we do things, and that change can't be...small.  

Among the Worst...

My wife took me to dinner for my birthday (Feb 12), and asked me the highlights of my 35th year.  (Among them, marrying her was a top!)  But her question has stayed with me.  And though 35 was a great year for many, many things, there was one experience in it all that was definitely traumatic.  Though it was only 50 minutes in length, and over 6 months ago, it still haunts my dreams.

 Sports are a big deal in our county.  Most kids (especially young boys) want to be professional athletes.  We can't think of a much cooler job than getting paid to play a sport.  Minus my year of Crew at a D III school, I haven't been a college athlete; (technically, the Crew team didn't have a meet, so I doubt it counts against my eligibility).  And though I do have a degree, I'll gladly chase another major if Tom Izzo wants me to play for the Spartans.  But until that happens, my sports outlets now rest in viewing or pickup.  

This is the case for a lot of us.  

Although the chance of ever getting paid to play are nearly zero, that doesn't stop most of us from reverting, every time we stop on a court, to seconds of former glory*.  

If you want to see a sport defiled, go to any YMCA open gym where there's a man in a headband, a group of kids that were obviously cut from high school teams, former bench warmers, or especially if anyone is wearing a knee brace, and you'll see that defilement in action.  

The problem is that most of us forget, for the length of the game, that this is pickup, that we don't (didn't?) have the talent to make it big, and that the true objectives of pickup sport are exercise and fun.  That doesn't stop us, though, from caring.  That doesn't mean we're willing to admit we lack skill and talent.  In our minds, we still deserve a shot; we can still make it big.  That next call could be from Izzo.  

Last spring, I was in one such league.

I was the captain of The Black Team, a team comprised of students and staff that met the following criteria: didn't play a high school sport, didn't have more than 2 E's, and had Thursday afternoons free.  

Pause.

Let that sink in, and then ask the question: does that criteria beg talent?

So The Black Team was made up of two faculty and six students, though there were never more than four of the original roster at any single game.  The other faculty member never showed up, and only signed up in the first place because it 'sounds fun'.  (He wrote that in an email, p.s.).  So it was me, 'sounds fun', and 4-5 kids with less than 2 E's and 0 varsity letters.  

Standing at 5'10 and 3/4's, toting the line (gracelessly) between overweight and obese, I was the only player on the team that could dribble without looking at the ball, and shoot one-handed behind the arc**.  But this was enough: my skills were lauded in this league.  If there was an All Star game, I would have been on it without question.  Hell, I would have been in the running for MVP.  

Our team won a couple of games, but it was hard to keep track of the score.  There were times when 3-4 minutes would run off the clock and all that happened was a group of 8 people were sprinting from one end of the court to the other and a ball never so much as hit a backboard.  A common theme amongst players was that we all love basketball: that's why we play.  But for most of the league, that love and reality don't mix.  So guys would mimmic the moves of KD, LeBron, Damian Lillard and Steph Curry, but their shot from 8 feet behind the arc may not reach the free throw line.  But playing in the game pales in comparison, as I found out after one of our games, to being a ref.

Reffing these games may be the closest I'll ever come to to understanding the feeling of ruling something awful****.  Ten has-beens, not-beens, couldda-beens, and wanna-be's are on the court at the same time, all competing for a trophy*****, reverting to the point - however far back - when they thought they could go pro.  

I can't remember a time I've been yelled at worse.  

Now, to make matter worse, I was the only ref.  I had to stand at half court (nursing a calf-injury) and watch a game in which either every thing or no thing was a foul.  How do you draw tht line?  There's either traveling every play or you let it go every play.  There's either contact on every drive or there's none.  The game had to be free-form or played (due to running clock) entirely from the foul line.  I chose free-form, not making a single call the entire first half.  

Which I heard about a lot.  I bet I got yelled at 40 times.  While running up and down the court, players would glare at me and tell me all types of things I should have called but didn't; these included: carries, offensive fouls, and three second calls.  I found myself standing there, in the midst of chaos, without a clue of how to proceed.  I think I was more in awe of the fact they wanted this defamation reffed than I was of how bad the game was played.  

By the second half, all the joy of playing and the day was gone.  I felt only terror.  It may have been the slowest 40-minutes of 2015.  I'd look at the clock - which ran the whole game - and think: how could only 17 seconds have run off?  How's that possible?******  At games end (thank you Lord), I felt the need to apologize to all 4 staff members.  I was told 'it's hard to ref'.  (True!)  I was thanked(!), and told: 'yeah.  These games are tough', 'I'd complain regardless of who the ref was', 'I always complain to refs', and even, 'thanks for doing this, we just needed someone'.  

That fact that I happened to be that unlucky someone haunted me for weeks.  (Still does a little, honestly).  

Once that game was done, I walked out of that gym so fast and vowed: I will never do that again.  

I'm scarred.  I'm haunted.  And, Im officially retired from reffing.  

---

*however small.  Like: I made a game-winning shot in 4th grade.  That may have been my personal peak.

**There was a point where I had to tell a teammate to stop guarding 'his guy' when we had the ball.***  

***(There was a time during a game where we were playing 4 on 5, because one of our players decided to sit at the scorers table and talk to a friend during a time out and didn't realize the game had started back up). 

****I realize that sentence sucked, but I failed at coming up with a relevant term: 3rd world country? Being in charge of a riot? The 1% at an Occupy Wall Street march?  Think of mass chaos and someone attempting to restore order, and that's what you get.

*****That turned into a championship game between the only two teams with eligible rosters.

******I think the only person that didn't complain was the kid that fell and cried, but I had no idea if he tripped or was hit.